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Monday, 21 January 2013

The Paralympics - and why the 'Legacy' Means Nothing

Recently the Oscar Pistorius murder in South Africa was told that attacks on disabled people, had increased since the London Paralympics, in 2012. For me. this isn't a surprise, and only goes to to reinforce everything I'm about to say.


I get angry every time I think about it. 

For me, this country hosting the Paralympics was bad enough, and now we’re faced with the relentless ‘Paralympic legacy’ rhetoric too.

In my opinion (and that of many other disabled and ill people I’ve spoken to) we should never have hosted the Paralympics in the first place. The very idea was hard to swallow.
How could we celebrate these seemingly ‘superhuman’ athletes and bask in their glory while away from the spotlight, ‘everyday’ disabled and ill people are being stripped of vital benefits, independence, dignity and rights at the hands of this government? Not to mention the seventy three deaths per week as a result of this government’s policies.

I chose to boycott the Paralympics for these reasons. When you add to that the fact (and it’s still hard to believe, I know) that the Paralympics was sponsored by ATOS – the very company our government is paying to strip disabled and ill people of these vital benefits (after putting us through a so –called ‘Work Compatability Assessment’ which we have been seemingly set up to fail), it became a sick joke!  My stomach turns over at the injustice of it.

So now, all these months later, Mr Cameron and his government are determined to keep peddling the idea of a ‘Paralympic legacy’. The idea that Britain is proud of its disabled people, the idea that the Paralympics has somehow furthered our cause and improved the way society views us.
It is at this point that I feel the anger rise in me once again. No! It’s a lie! It’s a huge (albeit well constructed) lie!

The ‘Paralympic legacy’ has been invented, better to say dreamt up purely to suit the government’s cruel agenda. It has used a vision of these ‘superhuman’ athletes who ‘overcome’ and ‘achieve’ against all the odds, in order to give the public the idea that all disabled and ill people could (and should) be doing the same – and those that don’t are lazy, exaggerating our disabilities. If we have the misfortune to have to live on benefits too, then we are ‘Scrounging off the state’.

After all, these ‘inspiring’, ‘achieving,’ ‘amazing’ athletes can do it, so why can’t the rest of us?! Why can’t we all just put in a little more effort?!  

As a quick side note, how are the rest of us supposed to feel about that - worthless, because we can’t ‘achieve’ like they do? Yes, that’s the idea!

This is where, to me, I feel like I’m stating the obvious, but judging by the rise in disability hate crime nationally and the suspicion with which disabled and ill people are now being viewed  by society, I need to say it anyway. We are not all like that!

In reality, the majority of disabled people can struggle to do basic things. For example, I cannot walk unaided, carry my cups of tea across the room, get in and out of the bath by myself, and I am often exhausted. Some days the pain is so bad that I can barely get out of bed – and I’m lucky compared to some.

Do these ‘superhuman’ athletes represent me? Do they represent the ‘everyday’ disabled person in this country?  No – they do not! The idea that it does, or that it should is deceitful, not to mention hurtful, when we know (despite how badly we may want to) that we can’t ‘measure up’ to a government imposed ideal of we should be.

Disability sport (and able sport) at the highest level, is elite, and obsessive. The athletes are conditioned. They work for hours and hours, day in and day out to get where they are – and they have a whole team of people to help, support, and encourage them. Granted, they have determination. They need it to do what they do.

In reality, every disabled person needs that to survive – especially in a society where we are being lied about, victimised, persecuted and stripped of our rights.

We need that determination to simply get through the day sometimes! Is there a gold medal waiting for the ‘everyday’ disabled person? Are we a source of (what will be temporary) national pride? No, we are not!
We are busy having to fight for basics, and justify our very existence. On top of everything else we already have to endure, we are now facing fear and panic for our future.

Since the Paralympics, many of the athletes that this country (and its government ) claim to be so proud of, and were hailing as national heroes last August and September, have also had their benefits cut for ‘not being disabled enough.’ 

That very fact alone can be used to prove that the so-called ‘Paralympic legacy’ idea is nothing but a fraud. It is a sick way of using the temporary glory of a few, to distract public attention away from the truth.

Disabled people of this country have nothing to celebrate. In fact many of us are dying, starving, losing vital services and being left housebound, while this government tries to tell our society (and the rest of the world) an entirely different story.

If there could be a real Paralympic legacy, it would and should be that ‘everyday’ disabled and ill people get our lives back – our rights, our dignity, our self-respect, and our benefits.

The real legacy should be a pushing forward of disability rights instead of taking it many, many steps back.

We should all be given the chance to live our lives in the best way we can. Until then the Paralympics and the ‘Paralympic legacy’ remains (to me and many others) nothing but a propaganda exercise.

It is only when all these wrongs are put right, and we have our lives back that ‘everyday’ disabled people  may feel a sense of ‘national pride’. Until then, the ‘Paralymic legacy’ will remain meaningless. 









     

Tuesday, 15 January 2013

A Bad Scene


Reddened face 
An angry fire,
I'm a saint,
And you're a liar!

Shattered glass
Where I took aim,
Lucky I missed,
But you're to blame!

Heated words 

And broken hearts,
Ice cold silence,
We lie apart. 


(Written - 1997 -Age 16)




#helenswriting

Saturday, 12 January 2013

Proud to Be Me!

 I didn't go to University, and I didn't get the journalism degree I would've wanted.

If you knew me during my school days (including my A levels) you might know that I suffered badly with depression, anxiety and pain, on top of the Cerebral Palsy, and  everything else!

You will also know that I did well enough in my GCSE's to do the A levels I wanted, but I was pressured to do three rather than two, which I could've managed better.

What you might not know, however, is that during my A level exams, I suffered the worst panic attacks I have ever had in my life!

During my R.E. exams, I was shaking so much that I could barely hold a pen, and during my English exams I had searing pain in my hips on both days, made worse by the fact that my body was tensing.

As a result, I failed two A levels and passed English, but I was heartbroken by the grade. I had worked as I could (given my circumstances) during that time.

It is the opinion of some (not that it matters now - but I'll say it anyway), that I 'did not work hard enough' and I have 'wasted my talent' by not going to University.

So let's sort a few things out. If I had gone to University I know that I wouldn't have been able to hack it then - the same as now. I fall apart in exams!

I wouldn't have met my amazingly kind, sensitive, wonderful husband, and whilst I might be earning more, and be measured as a 'success' by society (as well as certain members of my family), I'm SURE that I would not be able to devote my life to writing and campaigning - the way I can now.

If only society understood that 'success' isn't about how much money you earn, whether you live in a 'posh' house, or have the latest gadgets  - it's about what type of person you are, and what you 'put out there'.

This government (above almost everyone) needs to learn that lesson. People who claim benefits are not worthless 'scroungers'.We know what it's like to struggle and survive against all the odds. We know how to value and care for others.

Therefore, we are worth a million of the people who run this country. I would not trade my life (exactly the way it is) for their wealth and position - not for one single second.

I'd rather keep my compassion, openness, honesty and struggles than live like they do - destroying people's lives without any thought for the consequences.

So as of now, I refuse to let anybody (including this government), tell me that (in their eyes at least) I am a failure.

If what I've been through, and continue to go through makes me a failure, 'feckless,' 'workshy' or a 'scrounger' - then fine, but the problem is with society and NOT with me - or with any of us!

I am proud to be who I am, and I'm proud of what I do. No government is going to make me feel otherwise - EVER AGAIN!







#helenswriting


Friday, 11 January 2013

The Life of January (Poem)

January stands alone,
The little boy
No one wants,
To invite into their home.

He waits there,
As the lights come down
His pale face,
Becomes a frown,

“I hate myself,
 Can't you see?
Your misery,
Is because of me.”

January watches,
Through hollow eyes
No one cares,
Or hears his cries.

He is lonely,
All colour gone
His sad days,
Seem so long.

January is lost,
He needs a friend
But his raw fingers,
Won't extend.

He dies alone
But understands,
As February comes
To take his hand …















(Image: Google)

#helenswriting



Tuesday, 1 January 2013

Thursday, 20 December 2012

Lucky (Poem)

I'm lucky
Sitting here,
Cozy
And safe from the cold.
Lucky,
I have shelter
And a home.

I'm lucky
Sitting here,
Wondering what to eat for lunch,
Lucky,
I'm not a starving mass
Of dying skin
And bone.

I'm lucky
Sitting here,
Thinking of Christmas presents,
Lucky,
I don't face the season
Wandering
And alone.

I am lucky
Sitting here,
Family not far away
Lucky,
That I'm here at all,
And lucky,
I am loved.


Sunday, 2 December 2012

My Response To Lord Freud's Heartless 'Funeral' Comments



I was stunned by Lord Freud’s comments the other day. Something twisted in my stomach, and I wanted to throw the nearest object!

The ‘well, what do you expect?’ type attitude I got from some people I spoke to afterwards, didn’t even begin to cover it!


Firstly, ‘the poor should take more risks because they have less to lose’ idea doesn’t even make sense to me, and I don’t think it would to anyone who understood what it is like to struggle financially.

For those that have to live on a tight budget (and in more and more cases lately) have to choose between heating and eating, the idea of taking risks with what money you do have is a scary one. You can’t take risks with little or no ‘disposable income’ because every penny counts and you spend most of your life hoping that the proverbial ‘rainy day’ never comes.  


To me and many others those comments alone showed a fundamental lack of understanding that has been central to this government and their policies.  

 According to a May 2012 article in the Telegraph, the cabinet is worth seventy million pounds (source:  http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/9290520/Exclusive-Cabinet-is-worth-70million.html ). How then can they possibly claim to understand the hardship increasing numbers of people e are facing in today’s society? They can’t!


Many of them have been wealthy from birth and have had all the privileges and opportunities that go along with it. This brings me (albeit briefly) onto another important point. Why are we allowing ourselves to be so many clearly ‘out of touch’ elites?


Personally, I think it’s time for some big changes. There should be no more so called ‘career politicians’  who have been fast tracked as a result of who they know, where they went to school and how much money their family have. We need people who have at least lived a ‘real’ life and known what it’s like to do a ‘proper’ day’s work.


I’m a big believer in the idea that the experiences you have in life shape you as a person. If you haven’t experienced an ‘everyday life,’ it is going to seem distant from you and you will view things differently. The decisions being made will not have any impact on the people making them, so they don’t concern themselves with the consequences of their actions.


All this ties in rather nicely with further comments made by Lord Freud in the same interview. He was asked what he knew of a life where having ten pounds less to spend would make a difference? I was impressed by the guts of the interviewer in asking such a question, but the Minister’s response made my blood run cold. He said  

“We have a lot of information feedback and listen a lot, so I think we can absorb the information about what it takes and what’s required…I think you don’t have to be the corpse to go to a funeral, which is the implied criticism there.”


Several expletives and a calming conversation with some friends later, I had just about resisted the urge to throw something at the radio!


What hit me first was the total insensitivity of his comments. There is an average of seventy three deaths per week as a result of Welfare Reform. Deaths of the most vulnerable, ill and disabled people in our society who have either been found wrongly ‘fit for work’ by ATOS and died later or those who had been left feeling so fearful and desperate at the thought of life without vital benefits, that they saw no option but to take their own lives! With that in mind those comments are even sicker than they might first appear.


I was disgusted at the heartlessness of the man. These deaths are happening as a result of policies which he has put in place and to me it felt like he was rubbing our noses in it.  


I couldn’t help but think of the corpses of the people that have died as a result of this, and it isn’t an image any of us campaigners really want to be reminded of. It adds to the anxiety and fear that we already feel on a daily basis. We are confronted over and over again by the reality of what’s happening to us – just because we have the misfortune to be ill and disabled. His comments compounded all that and actually, made me feel physically sick.


May I remind you Lord Freud, that when you attend someone’s funeral, it usually means that you cared about them,  and you valued their life. You have no such feelings about the lives of the poor, disabled and ill. Your comments showed that we are worthless to you and your government. If we weren’t you would never have made them!


If it was up to me, Lord Freud would resign. His comments were despicable and unforgivable. The attitude of this whole government towards the sick and disabled is embodied right there, in the attitude of one man. I was left feeling worthless temporarily, but it made me more determined than ever to fight back, and I did that through writing this article.


I am not a corpse! My life and the lives of thousands of others like me, has meaning and value even if you and your government can’t see it!  It is you that are the corpses because you clearly don’t have an ounce of understanding or compassion. You have no right to make judgements on us.