I didn't go to University, and I didn't get the journalism degree I would've wanted.
If you knew me during my school days (including my A levels) you might
know that I suffered badly with depression, anxiety and pain, on top of the Cerebral Palsy, and everything else!
You will also know that I did well enough in
my GCSE's to do the A levels I wanted, but I was pressured to do three
rather than two, which I could've managed better.
What you might not know, however, is that during my A level exams, I
suffered the worst panic attacks I have ever had in my life!
During my R.E. exams, I was shaking so much that I could barely hold a
pen, and during my English exams I had searing pain in my hips on both
days, made worse by the fact that my body was tensing.
result, I failed two A levels and passed English, but I was heartbroken
by the grade. I had worked as I could (given my circumstances) during
It is the opinion of some (not that it matters now -
but I'll say it anyway), that I 'did not work hard enough' and I have
'wasted my talent' by not going to University.
So let's sort a
few things out. If I had gone to University I know that I wouldn't have
been able to hack it then - the same as now. I fall apart in exams!
I wouldn't have met my amazingly kind, sensitive, wonderful husband,
and whilst I might be earning more, and be measured as a 'success' by society (as well as certain members of my family), I'm SURE that I would not be able to devote
my life to writing and campaigning - the way I can now.
only society understood that 'success' isn't about how much money you
earn, whether you live in a 'posh' house, or have the latest gadgets - it's about what type of person you are, and what you 'put out there'.
This government (above almost everyone) needs to learn that lesson.
People who claim benefits are not worthless 'scroungers'.We know what
it's like to struggle and survive against all the odds. We know how to
value and care for others.
Therefore, we are worth a million of
the people who run this country. I would not trade my life (exactly the
way it is) for their wealth and position - not for one single second.
I'd rather keep my compassion, openness, honesty and struggles than
live like they do - destroying people's lives without any thought for
So as of now, I refuse to let anybody (including this government), tell me that (in their eyes at least) I am a failure.
If what I've been through, and continue to go through makes me a
failure, 'feckless,' 'workshy' or a 'scrounger' - then fine, but the
problem is with society and NOT with me - or with any of us!
I am proud to be who I am, and I'm proud of what I do. No government is going to make me feel otherwise - EVER AGAIN!