For the first time in ages I have woken up without pain. In fact, I can't remember the last time it happened. It is an amazing feeling. I feel like a real person, human again. It doesn't matter that it is cold and cloudy outside. Inside I am warm and alive.
The best thing is that there is nothing there - absolutely nothing.
My body seems to be at peace today, and if this is what 'normal' is, I want to keep it. However, I know it won't last so I intend to enjoy every single second of it. I wish I could dance now. It would be lovely to be able to twirl around the room and express how free I feel.
It may seem silly, but Julie Andrews at the beginning of 'The Sound of Music' has got nothing on the way I feel now. In fact, I think I may sing about it too! Keep your fingers crossed that the cats don't join in!
I wish Colin was here to share it with me - he would make a very good Captain von Trapp I think.
No, seriously, it would be good. I feel light and happy. It could have been a "who are you, and what have you done with my wife?" day. Maybe I'll phone him at work and see if he can come home early. We could walk to the field and lie in the grass. Yes, I know it is cold and damp, but it might as well be summer to me.
I can't explain it any better. When you live with disability and pain everyday, the relief is just so beautiful, and it makes me feel so lucky. I appreciate it more than I can ever tell you.
Oh, this is so wonderful! I hope I can keep it - just for a little while.
#helenswriting
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